Facebook is the new Guilt

My therapist and a few other people have said: "If your mother's facebook posts annoy you that much, then why don't you block her? You just keep going back for more."

Well...two reasons:

(1) it is kind of an "early warning system" as to what she is starting to obsess about, and what she is going to try to throw at us next.   We have a better idea if it is wise to just flat out ignore her, or if maybe....just maybe...it could be an actual problem ...and we might want to answer the phone.

(2) anytime I sit around thinking "Gosh and golly gee, maybe I am being mean.  Maybe I am exaggerating all this...." I can go look at her recent posts and think: "Nope...still bonkers."


And...actually....
(3) I don't have the heart to block her, because that would cause her to not be able to see updates and photos of the grandkids. Since she is working on being helpless, she already only sees them about twice a year...even though she lives 30 miles away. If she ever starts inflicting The Wackiness around/to them, though...the blocks will go up fast.

Guilt du jour

Today's guilt email is sponsored by.... Chocolate: the Comfort that keeps on Comforting.  Have a chocolate bar or 12 today.


And, the Mother writes.... [Kathy is my sister, I am MJ]

Kathy not sleeping and upset from Mj it seems we pass how sick I am and mn says I could do everything just wanted phone call and still do we also need help and Mj saying she is not going to help u don't think it upsets me and stresses when u won't call me or accept my call  we had such a nice visit last mon  I had hope u understood u girls have abandoned me and ur brother. Kathy please call me


Let the chocolate consumption begin!


*******
Here are my suggested responses (which she would promptly ignore):

(1) f*ck off

(2) mj suggested an outing to the mall with the kids,and said she hoped you would be a part of Sammy's birthday.  I dont see how that is abandoning you.  She simply stated we will not do things the doctors say you should do for yourself, and that we will no longer play a part in crying/screaming/obsessive drama.  If you think THAT is abandoning you, then that is your decision.  We didn't say that.  You did.  You are making the choice that we either have to do everything you want, when you want it,and how you want it -- or we are abandoning you.  Your choice.

(3). F*ck off

(4). Any doctor you talk to will tell you that the only reason you are bedridden is because you have decided to be bedridden.  Yes, movement may hurt....but that is part of getting older and you need to do it anyway.  Everyone else does.  EVERYONE has pain and various medical issues.  Doctors and nurses have told you this.  You just dont want to hear it, so you don't listen and remember.

(5) f*ck off

(6) how come after months of being disowned, the ONLY thing that will decrease your stress level is for me to call you?  You broke contact, not me.  I am not responsible for your stress level.  If you need help managing your stress, perhaps you should see a therapist of some sort.  I will help you find one and make the appointment if you want.

(7) f*ck off

(8). Any combination of the above